why I am going to be single, forever

After literally a lot of pondering and “hit & trial” I am finally confirming that I am going to be forever single. Let’s not get into the past details, but I know that I am waaay to complicated for this era. Let me repeat, I believe I’m just ‘perfect’ to have someone else complete me!

I have pondered over my dominatrix,  and finally concluded reasons for this singlehood.

10. I need a fairly financially secure man… I know I am a bohemian with a flair for class. I believe they’re generally referred to as artists. We all know how we earn! Someone’s gotta pay those bills you know! 😛

9. I know that fairly financially secure men live in the cities.  That’s where there is dough! But with it comes the snoot fest of the societies! I know I am humble like that, and I am no contender of class battle. D’oh! Do city boys come without classicism? Eh, not really!

8. Along with money and humility, I need a man who can talk sense.. you know, stars, economy, politics… I am sapiosexual and smart talk gives me those multiple orgasms them gynaecs talk about. Party talk and “I did this…” talk is reverse orgasm.

So, rich, humble, and intelligent….

7. But not boring… so intellectual available men are either nerdy,  or self involved with passion. D’oh! But I love talking!!

6. Then I need someone self made. You know, not the rich inheritance kinda men. Only because I hate drama about property and money and etc.

5. If that’s even possible, I want someone who is not social savy (which means postponing  our romantic evening together for a social networking event) Can self made men do that? Cos you know, to be self-made one needs the right conections generally found at networking.

4. He has to be a nature lover,  and a travel- in- grunge junkie! Humm… if only they could take time off deliberating the next project.

3. I have noticed that before I meet these men, they’ve had a woman who nurtured their ingenuity and passion, to make them self-made. These women are generally referred to as “mom”. If I am to have a humble, intelligent, self-made man for a husband / boyfriend, I need to cook, do the laundry, and pick up after him. But… I can’t pick up after people! I’ve done my share of baby-sitting and I don’t think it’s for adults. I’ll put the laundry in the drier but I’m not picking up your dinner plate!

2. Then, I can’t sit idle. And I am constantly at race against time. Rich, self- made, humble men need rest like a log of wood in the corner waiting for winter, and longer weekend sleep hours. D’oh! What a waste of time! Especially when it’s our time! Why don’t you do the same, when you have corporate lunch meetings on a Sunday? “Sorry Mr.Client, it’s my Sunday I’m going to lay in my boxers and sleep or watch a game.” It’s a Sunday!!!

1. I need a rich, humble, self- made, extra energetic man, who is more romantic than your best romantic dude from them mythological stories! Who will spoon me every night, Plant kisses when I pass by his work table, wake me up at 4 am to make sweet love to me… oh!!! (I melt at the thought)

Are you out there Mr.Right??

Ok men! Feel the pressure already? And that’s why I’m letting you off the hook. And this is why I have finally chosen to be single…forever! *sigh*


Published by: shwetalogy

Camera | Car | Coffee | Cigarettes | Cats - are 5 things I can't live without. I worry about the world in every sense, including our deteriorating capitalism, culture, environment, families, and politics. Connecting dots to all the above is my hobby, which I pen down here. Everything in the world is connected, and we need to find the wedges to swim through for a better future. I am funny like that, and I love clicking photographs, you can follow my instagram @shwetalogy

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